Game of Hearts
by kimazuikame
Summary: Romano, Veneziano, Germany, and Prussia play a game of cards to help them 'bond'. Rated for language and suggestive humor.


**Game of Hearts**

_I was bored and playing that Hearts card game on my mom's laptop. I noticed that the opponents are named West, North, and East._

_(With your set being in the south).Naturally I thought of Germany, Prussia, and the Italian twins! So that's where this little piece of crack came from xD Some GerIta, but mostly just a game of cards._

_Rated T for Romano's potty mouth and Prussia's sense of humor._

_Country and human names used._

_Note: This a game where points are bad_

"Why the FUCK are you-a dragging me to the potato bastardo's house?!" Romano groaned aloud as he was tugged along by his little brother.

"You need to get along with Doitsu, Fratello! You can't just sulk in your room whenever he comes over! Plus HIS big brother The Awesome will be there, too. Maybe you'll make a new friend!" Veneziano explained cheerfully.

"The Awesome?" asked Romano with a sneer in his voice.

"Ve~ Mr. Prussia told me to call him that!"

The older Italian sighed exaggeratedly, "He sounds like-a Potato Bastardo #2."

~Meanwhile~

"PRUSSIA! Put down that beer and put some damn pants on!"

"Kesesese~ No one can clothe mein sheer AWESOMENESS!"

Germany was bellowing at the albino to put more clothes on, as the latter was strutting around in a t-shirt and a pair of Gilbird-print boxers.

"Veneziano and his bruder will be here soon." Germany scolded, "And you need to be properly dressed!"

"I know you're just going to take the little Italian up to your room to give him the 5 meters. Why do either of us need to put on pants? Maybe mein awesome boxers will turn him on and you'll get a better shot!" Gilbert was folded over laughing at his own joke, whilst Germany was remarkably unmoved. However a light dusting of pink betrayed his embarrassment.

Turning his face away, he explained tersely, "Nein. Both twins are coming-", Prussia wiggled his eyebrows suggestively, "and we are going to play cards. Feli wants all of us to get closer."

"UUUUUGGGGGGHHhhhhhhHHHhhh..." Prussia complained, "I don't wanna see their stupid Italian faces..."

"You are going to see their faces, you are going to be polite, and you are going to be WEARING PANTS!"

Gilbert sighed and skulked to his room, dragging his feet all the way.

~A few minutes later~

Ding-dong! Ding-dong! Ding-dong!

"Fratello stop playing with the fucking doorbell!"

Ding-dong!

SMACK!

"OOOoooowww! Roma you are such a meany pants!"

Germany managed to answer the door just in time to see Romano with Feli in a choke hold. Groaning, he separated the two by grabbing them by the scruff. South flailed indignantly whilst spewing curses, while North squirmed out of the grip to clutch Germany's back with all fours.

This, Ludwig thought to himself, was a mistake.

Despite himself, he calmly walked into the living with Romano at arm's length and Veneziano nuzzling his neck in fear.

"Let's get this over with." Germany sighed, ignoring Prussia's obnoxious giggles.

After a lot of cursing, whining, and indignation, the four countries managed to set up a table and distribute the cards.

"So what-a stupido game are gonna play anyways?", Romano grumbled.

"Hearts!" Answered a perhaps-a-bit-too-happy voice.

"That's where we trade then try not to end up with hearts, ja?", inquired Germany.

"Yep~!"

"Because hearts are for pussies."

"Prussia!"

At this point Romano briefly considered liking Prussia. (The thought was quickly dismissed as insane.)

They traded up with suspicious glances cast by all but Veneziano.

"Two of clubs starts." Reminded the smiling little Italian.

His grouchy counterpart wordlessly placed down the card in question.

3 hands into the game, Feli was 35 points higher than anyone else. A look of determination unfolded over his features. (If you asked Germany, the look was adorable. But he would never say it out loud) Meanwhile Prussia was loudly bragging how awesome he was at this stupid game, as he was somehow winning. Romano- a mere 3 points behind- was giving him a look that could rot a whole field of tomatoes.

By 6, poor little Italy was at 91, 64 points in the hole, and about to cry. Germany was trying to comfort him to no avail.

At 8, Feli had officially lost, Prussia's pants were tossed aside as he performed a victory dance, and the 4 of them never, ever played cards again.

_So I'm not entirely pleased with the ending... but this has been sitting here too long so I decided to publish it._

_Tanks for reading ^.^_


End file.
